Thursday, September 6, 2012

the nothing place and a call to arms

I am in a fight with my brain. 

My old nemesis Depression and his sweaty faced toady Anxiety are trying to move back into my brain and take over. I want to sparkle, live in my happy body, move forward with my hope and take great pleasure in every moment, but my brain is having a hard time fending off those two Assholes who make me hate myself, my body, my surroundings and paralyze me in the nothing place. 
"C'mon, brain," I say, "we're smarter than this. Just throw them out and we can get back to business!"
 "It's not about smart!", my brain counters between pummelings, "It's about energy! It's about communion! It's about feeding the well!"

I need help in my fight, friends. I need to walk, drink coffee, have dates, remind myself how to sparkle, and feed my well.

Will you help me?


  1. If you ever want to skype or be pen pals I would be delighted to help from afar! Sending you love and best wishes.

  2. That would be amazing. I love reading about your sheep.

  3. Wow, I honor your courage. Just saying out loud that you're ready to rumble and fight for your well-being should make depression run for cover.

    But I had postpartum depression after Lily was born and I was shocked at how impervious to rational talk it was. It's a wily adversary.

    I'm just so glad you're telling the community and the universe that you know what can be and what you want and you're going to try any/everything to get yourself there.

  4. We're moving back to MN in June, would love to hang out then.

  5. Julia! That's thrilling!

    Thanks for your kind words, Kato.